"The true object of all human life is play. Earth is a task garden; heaven is a playground." - G K Chesterton
Bedok's the best area to live in man. I mean, all the old-school swings that I used to play in primary school can be found here, all around the vicinity!

Was out with Perc yesterday night, and we had supper @ Simpang. I was in the mood for some beers after that (actually was an excuse to get him to come with me to the playground near our area to play swings) but bro said that we should probably drink the beers in the kopi-tiam instead of having canned beers at a playground. So, after 2.5 mugs of carlsberg each, we made our way to the swings. However the swings nearer my block were half occupied by other people (it was 130am man!) so Perc suggested we go to the one a bit further up (guarantee no people! He said...) . Within 5 minutes I was swinging away like a mad bitch. I'm always a swing-pro in primary school cos I knew the mechanics of swinging. I always swung like I was winning & I am definitely not ashamed about boasting this skill of mine. LOL...

So anyways, Perc was quite shocked that I could swing that high & he told me he could never swing at this intensity. Being the ever benevolent and kind soul, I decided to teach him how. He was initially reluctant to embarrass himself on a swing (since we are already in our 20s) but I cajoled him into it somehow. The first few times he was swinging in an absolutely hilarious zig-zagged manner but in a matter of minutes, my coaching worked its magic and Perc was swinging his life's first highest point on that bloody swing of Bedok South!!! I'm sure some of you out there innately want to prove to those primary school kids that you can swing better than them even though you're probably a decade or two older, not as nubile or twice / thrice their size to be able to swing as gracefully. But... ... ... Do you wana show those little kids who is the king of the swing?! Do you want them to kowtow to you & acknowledge you as the supreme swing master?! Do you wana banish them from the face of these playgrounds so that you can also have your fair share of a swinging-good time??!! Today, and exclusively today, I shall impart my secret manual to you... ...






That's why people always say, learn from the experts!
PS: I took 20 minutes to painstakingly draw this...& then 5 times to scan it fully in. If it works, thank me ok.


Swing away! Swing until you get airsick! Swing like you f**king own the swing! & while you're at it, get high! (just don't down too much beer before that cos Perc gave up halfway, stating that he really needs to pee.) ---> I flew to the loo twice before heading to the playground, definitely did not want to hold my pee then shower my "blessings" on the playground.

What are you waiting for? Go find a nearby swing already!