Uninspired by the lack of response by potential employers & my ever-diminishing financial state of affairs, I landed myself a small stint as a transport surveyor. The job scope was very simple: Company gives you an ezlink card (a card that enables you to travel on public transport like buses and trains in Sg), you test out the new "distance" fare system and record the amount paid per journey. So essentially, I spent a week travelling around the whole of Singapore, all expenses paid & earning pocket money for that. It was a rather neat job, albeit exhausting at times (I need to search for bus stops and ascend/descend buses and trains for 6-14 hours a day, imagine that...). But as this week came to a wrap, I found myself thoroughly enjoying the ride, literally & figuratively.
The perks of this job included me travelling to places which I had not set foot on in the last 25 or so years in my life (though Sg is extremely small), and discovering again, the lost beauty of this urban jungle which I had grown so jaded with. The downside though, was witnessing some disgusting human nature of my fellow civilians, such as inconsideration, general lack of hygiene and assorted acts of bewilderment.
The top 5 "Habitus Digustica" witnessed were:
1) Picking of noses. A favourite habit of men, especially middle-aged ones living in the heartlands. Strange middle-aged aunties were also perpetuators of said activity. Actually saw one who got so high on his booger-fest, his eyes were closed and jaw hung opened, as though he was in a nirvanic trance. A fine example:
So sexy...NOT!
2) Pretending to sleep once a heavily pregnant woman or an elderly comes on board. A common practice of most locals.
3) Pretending to pay fares, but actually cheating on them by "tapping out" at the exit immediately after "tapping in" at the front.
Information for non-Sg'reans: A system on our buses & trains involved us "tapping in" with our ezlink cards which had a stored value at the entrance. At the end of our journey, we would need to "tap out" our cards and the system would register the distance travelled and charge us accordingly. So if we "tap in and out" at the same bus stop, we would either be charged less or not be charged at all. A stunt mostly pulled by middle-aged aunties and uncles. An example to enlighten the ignorant about Sg's ezlink transport system:
4) Rushing into the MRT (Mass Rapid Transit) trains without letting passengers alight first. A favorite activity of "Kiasu" locals who rush in as though they cannot wait to be reincarnated. Besides rushing into trains, local commuters also love to rush for seats. once I witnessed a man and a lady dashing for the same seat, in the end the man was a split second faster and the lady ended up sitting on his leg & jumping up in embarrassment. I couldn't help but laugh. If only we plant spies to track potential olympic runners on these buses & trains...we probably will win medals sometime.
5) Besides the all-time favourite of booger-ing for "gold", assorted disgusting acts you can expect to see day-to-day include a) picking scabs under the soles of feet. b) occupying 2 seats when you actually paid for one fare, i.e.: letting your bags, plastic bags and belongings take a seat even when the bus or train is extremely crowded. c) ear wax-picking...
Assorted people from 1), a) & c) would proceed to get up the bus/train and hold on to the railings and handlebars with the hand of sin. Brrrrrr...I'm so getting dettol hand sanitizers
( -_-"')
Example a):
Example b):
Initially, I thought that witnessing such behavior would put me off entirely, however, I found myself both bemused and amused. Perhaps I have gained enlightenment & found humour in these situations. As I recollected my experience over the past week, I realised that apart from all these negativities, I did actually see random acts of kindness and some really cute scences, such as this:
Little boy falling asleep on big boy. Adorable!
Hope your week spent on transportation will be as inspiring & HIGHlarious as mine. Have a good one! =)
